Sunday, October 4, 2009

I See... A CTR Ring

My daughter belongs to a radical shadowy underground religious organization. She is a member of a (cue three bars of scary organ music here) … CTR Ring!

For years this secretive organization was so mysterious that no one knew what CTR stood for- Can't Take Radiation? Capture The Rag? Clean Tiny Rats? My wife flattered me when she speculated that it could mean “Choose the Richie.” After observing unusual behavior over several months, however, I knew that CTR could stand for only one thing- “Choose the Right.”

She joined when she was only 7 years old. Since then she has been involved in several activities that could easily be considered radical by other children her age. She could be found being honest, helping her parents with the dishes, playing quietly with her brother, reading scriptures, and doing homework instead of playing a favorite video game.

I later learned that there were hundreds, perhaps even thousands, of these gangs of righteousness, these CTR rings, forming in ward and branch primaries across the worldwide church. I also learned that the cryptic sign that bound them all together, the universal symbol of their commitment to radical righteousness, was a thin strip of plastic wrapped around a finger with three letters boldly inscribed on it: CTR. I guess it could be called... a CTR Ring!


  1. Choose the Richie! I like that one!

  2. Haha! Great post - I love good Mormon humor. Especially as a guy that sells CTR rings. :)

  3. Funny & insightful.


  4. This is a cute post. Thanks for brightening my day this General Conference weekend!