Sunday, May 3, 2009

I See... How to Make the Ward Grow

It's that time of the year again... the beginning of the moving season. Students moving home for summer vacation, families moving out while school is out, young families graduating from graduate programs and moving somewhere where someone will now pay them for what they were just paying to do in school. The Elder's Quorum Moving Co. is fully employed. For our ward, the Hampstead Ward, this translates into the nightmare of 14 families leaving with only a few new promising recruits on the horizon.

So, how do we grow the ward now? Sure, there are the traditional tried and true methods of bringing souls unto Christ by reactivating less-active members and baptizing new ones, but that takes a lot of faith that a lot of us don't have. (but should!) I'm promoting a more radical, out-of-the box method- recruiting!

Yes, that's what I said- recruiting! I'm confident that if we offer the right incentives, the right people will move into our right ward. And who do we want? Righteous families of all ages and sizes. And what do righteous families want? They want blessings. I'm proposing we offer them blessings; more blessings than the average ward, which according to the divine formula, would result from more service and sacrifice than the average ward.

What type of members would our ward attract, for example, if we advertised 14% tithing instead of 10%? Promises of 10 home and visiting teaching families assigned to each priesthood holder and Relief Society sister? Mandatory temple trips twice a week? Fasting every Sunday? Choir practice every Sunday before AND after church?

I'm thinking that once faithful church members realized the massive amounts of blessings they could reap through such overzealous church service and sacrifice, they would be flooding the local area with hungry real estate agents looking for that perfect home in the perfect neighborhood within ward boundaries. The ward would be fully staffed in a matter of weeks. By the end of the summer moving season, there would be talk of the Hampstead Second Ward.

What do you think?


  1. I have heard in some sociological circles that more stringent religions tie their members in stronger so a higher tithe and more HT'ing could result in a better retention rate if nothing else!

  2. I think your blog is almost "cultish". Don't you think you toe a line of being sacreligeous?

  3. It would only border on sacreligious if I was serious about it... but since I'm trying to make the same point the first comment already raised, I think I'm ok...

  4. That has been a good help, thanks a ton, now to make the ward grow is simple and easy with your tips. Kudos